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February Progress Report

by Bronze Southpaw

Pewter's progress report from February for anyone who missed it.

February 23 - 29

Mar 08, 2012 3:00 AM

Progress Report

The Week in Review

February 23: Pewter Southpaw made his comeback this night against BUFFY BOY (a BUFFY B 1997 fighter). That's right, I do more than write commentary. I fight, too. I drew one of those guys who hides behind his gloves for twelve rounds because his manager doesn't care enough to give him a plan. Most of the guys in my gym take this as a personal challenge to try and knock the guy out through his guard. Not me. There's no additional incentive for that, since my rank and rating are not the same. A decision is the same as a KO. So I danced around for the first seven rounds flickig a jab and working up a sweat. Naturally, I won those rounds easily. Then I hid behind my gloves and mirrored what he did. Surprisingly, I won those rounds, too. I was also able to rest, so I felt like I could go twelve more rounds when it was over. Not too impressive, but a win for me and a win for the gym.

American Staffordshire Terrior vs. Coroner's Continental Crusader: AST went up agianst a fighter from The Coroner's gym this week. CCC came out firing and took a quick lead. AST didn't seem to let it get to her though. She methodically went about the business of fighting her fight and taking a round here and there. Sometimes she even performed for the fans while Crusader took a break. As the rounds wore on, however, she picked up the pace. In fact, we weren't sure if it was even, or if she was up by a round when it came to the final round. In the end it didn't matter. Apparently, The Coroner told his boy that he needed a knockout for the win and he charged across the ring straight into a right hand from Terrior. That was it.

February 24: Tooloose Mywallet Was very dissapointed with his loss to Oogleberry last week and was determined to make up for it against The Coroner's boxer, My Fists......Your Hearse. It didn't look like Mywallet's comeback will be easy. Both fighters came out doing more grappling than actual boxing and Mywallet found himself behind early. To keep himself from getting too far behind, he would move outside and take advantage of his height while Hearse continued to wrestle. This tactic kept him in the fight and won him a couple of rounds. When My Fists took a break in round six, it left the two fighters dead even on our card. With The Coroner's boy sitting on his stool taking large tugs on his watter bottle between rounds, Tooloose's confidence was building. But the fight was still up for grabs. He went back to working his clinch while ...... took the fight inside, up close and personal. Both fighters were putting everything they had into each shot, hoping to be the first to find the chink in the other's armor. Hearse won round seven and attempted to stay inside while Bronze's guy took a step back and started to work his jab again. The two fighters were back in a dead heat again to start round nine and both fighters closed to the center of the ring again. The crowd was on its collective feet roaring with excitement as these two gladiators duked it out in the center of the ring. 'C-h-i-n-k!!' It happened. Your Hearse was obviously tired as he returned to his corner at the end of the round and Mywallet's performance had given him the lead according to our accounting. Hearse wasn't giving up, though, as both fighters returned to the center of the ring for round ten. It doesn't get any better than this. Again they were toe to toe, but Tooloose was definately the fresher fighter landing the crisper punches and working the clinch. He won that round, too, though, the other man was the busier fighter. Our boy closed to the center of the ring, ready for a repeat of the previous two rounds, but his opponent knew he was beaten. He closed his eyes and raced forward swinging wildly. Then, flop. He was on his back for a seven count. Back up, he charged again. They exchanged some wicked shots and, finally, Hearse went to sleep. The fight left both men blodied. Tooloose needed seventeen stiches to close the gash above his left eye and his opponent needed nearly twice as many to close the one he had.

This was the kind of fight that shortens the careers of both fighters. Will either of these guys be able to return to peak performance? Only time will tell. One thing's for sure. It's what the fans pay the big money for and they got their money's worth that night. This makes two weeks in a row that Tooloose Mywallet has been involved in a war and it doesn't appear to get any easier from here. Oogleberry lost on the same card and it is likely the two will meet again next week for a reprise of their fight last week.

February 25: Fred "Stilts" Cannon had the honor of representing our gym against For Whom the dinner Bell Tolls, one of The Coroner's fighters. We were concerned about this fight and gave Stilts a very concervative fight plan. For the first few rounds we asked him to work the clinch and work the body to get a chance to gauge Tolls's strength and toughness. We figured that we would open things up if this left us behind. We've been training Stilts' cardio and were pretty sure he could produce the added production in the late rounds. As it turned out, The Coroner's fighter had a similar plan. However, he came out standing straight up, which allowed our guy to land more effective punches and take those early rounds. By the end of round four, For Whom was starting to show signs of slowing down, while Cannon had a good sweat going, but was fairly fresh. Some of the rounds were pretty close, but we had Fred winning all four. After round six Tolls was obviously tired and Fred had found his rythm and had taken every round. We told him that at this point it was his fight to lose. As long as he didn't do anything stupid or get caught, he was going to get the win. As the rounds went on, we piled up the points. We had Stilts winning every round going into the final round. Cannon decided to go head hunting in case Tolls launched a despirate attack, but his tactics did not change. We got a knock down and the Decision win. It was just the thing to continue what is looking like a good week.

Tallon vs. Shake n Bake: After being knocked out by Joe Montana last week, Tallon was quite happy to get a shot at another fighter from Top Rank's gym. He was determined not to allow history to repeat itself. Shake came out clinching and working the body hard. Tallon kept his distance and used his jab. Both guys were throwing bombs. At the end of round five both fighters were obviously tired, but Tallon was clearly up having won four rounds to one. We asked Tallon if he needed to take a round off and catch his breath. Just about that time, he wrinced and spit, but missed the bucket and got Bronze in the eye, instead. Bronze said nothing. The abuse continued to pile up for both fighters, but Tallon was getting the best of it. In round nine, Bake took a shot to the jaw that sent him through the ropes and out of the ring. We were sure the fight was over, but somehow he climbed back into the ring at the count of seven and the abuse continued. In round ten, Shake stopped clinching and moved inside. This left him wide open for the fresher Tallon, who landed a devistating uppercut that landed Top Rank's fighter on his face to end the fight. Tallon had avenged his loss and become the first fighter from the Bronze Southpaw gym to get a win against a Top Rank fighter since our return.

Basasrorytaugh vs. Dr. QUACK: Basasrorytaugh's comeback has been less than stellar. In fact, it's been downright dissapointing. We hoped that his luck would change this week against Dr. QUACK, but fighters from Angee's gym are always tricky. Again, we used a conservative plan and it seemed to be working. For the first four rounds, QUACK worked his way inside while Death by Red Axe (that's what his name means) stayed outside and scored points with his jab. The in round five, Dr. charged across the ring with a bone- crushing hook followed up with an uppercut that left our guy flat on his face again.

February 27: Bronze Southpaw definately didn't want a rematch with Freddy Adu just one week after his loss, but nonetheless, he was looking forward to it. He talked about nothing more that getting even with this guy from Top Rank's gym. He studied the film from the fight and looked at Freddy's previous fights until he was sure that he had his opponent figured out. Then he went to work training hard for the fight. In the end, it didn't matter, Freddy had looked at the film, too, and he changed some things in his plan. He had Bronze confused by round seven. At that point, he decided he was going to do whatever it took to go into the final round with the lead. It wasn't to be, however, as Adu took the all-decisive eleventh round going up by one. Bronze went all out in the last round hoping for a surprise knockout or at least a knock down. The opportunity was there. It seems Adu had the fight much closer, throwing more than 70 punches. Stumpy remarked that he looked like Goober to which Junior agreed. Unfortunately, he didn't end up on the mat like Goober. Bronze lost his second in a row.

Bronze Southpaw Jr. vs. scarecrow shorter: We're still trying to figure out what we said to anger scarecrow. Is Angee feeling picked on after seeing so many of his boys taking naps? We still don't know and, surprisingly, they aren't talking. shorter went all out for the first two rounds and then moved inside, clearly wanting to wear down the young Southpaw. Junior didn't allow himself to get drawn into a brawl, however and continued to work from outside - easily taking round after round. In round ten, scarecrow decided to attempt to corner Junior. That was very inefectual. It just left him open to everything that was thrown in his direction. shorter was desperate for round twelve having not only lost every round, but having had a point deducted for a low blow in round eight. He went all out again and the results were the same. Bronze Jr. won his third in a row.

Harvey Fierstein vs. Richard "Doctor" Kimble: this week it was Harvey who drew poor Richard Kimble. With Demise on a vacation or something, there's noone to give the good Doctor any advice. Being left on his own is proving very hazardous to his health. Doctor tries clinching with Harvey and finds himself on the mat once in each of the first four rounds and twice in rounds five and six. Luckily for him, he couldn't make it to round seven.

Paul "Stumpy" Buniuns vs. Sam Slate: Angee's boy Sam probably didn't count on winning tonight, but he come to try. He cam out standing straight up in round one, much to our surprise. After round one, he did as expected and move outside and tried to use his jab to stay out of Stumpy's clinch. Paul also managed to land at least one good shot to slate's nads in each of the first three rounds without the ref having a clue. Where's Chris? Stumpy has something for him, too. We didn't want to get too far behind on points and have to go for the KO, so our guy picked up his punch count easily winning rounds four and five. Round six sees Slate trying to cut off the ring. Someone should have told him that Stumpy doesn't like to feel cornered. Sam backed off after the headbutt. After finally being warned, Stumpy decided it was time to stop having fun and finish the fight. He opens up round seven with a barage of punches only to see his opponent run and hide. We worked over Slate pretty good in round eight as well. By this time, we felt it was dead even and Sam was ready to go. They split rounds nine and ten as Slate continued to cut off the ring and corner the younger fighter. Again Slate forces our boy into the corner in an effort to work him over. Stumpy is good in the clinch, however, and Slate is unable to do significant damage. Finally, the last round and our boy is down by one; his opponent is tired and the opportunity is his for the taking. Paul switches his tactics and takes the fight inside. His opponent is still trying to cut off the ring. This has the effect of having both of them standing toe to toe in the center of the ring and chaos ensues. Slate goes down due to a huge uppercut. Stumpy is caught by a haymaker and he goes down. He rises to his feet and the two exchange devistating blows. Then Buniuns fires a right cross that puts his opponent down for good.

February 28, 2012 Steve Erkle had assured us that he was ready for his match up with one of Angee gym’s AL LEE clones and judging from his workouts this week, we believed him. He really looked sharp and ready to get back from his current slump. The fight opened with Erkle circling while AL attempted to cut him off. We expected this from the old timer, so it was no surprise. They both stayed buisy but Erkle was more accurate taking the first round. This was how we expected the fight to go and Steve was prepared. He picked up a minor cut and some swelling over his right eye during the second round, but it didn’t seem to bother him as he won that round, too. But it was clearly bothering him in round three as he wasn’t able to slip LEE’s shots as effectively in that round. Bronze was confident that we won that round, but I wasn’t so sure. Then LEE changed tactics. Instead of trying to corner us, he was trying to work his way inside and lower his production in favor of harder punches. We won that round and the next two easily, but Steve was starting to show the effects of AL’s change in tactics. Bronze and I differed on the score, but it was starting to look like it wouldn’t matter as Steve built on his lead. Then Erkle lost the seventh round – even Bronze agreed about that. This fight had just become a war, and our boy was really showing its effects. Meanwhile LEE was still looking fairly fresh. Our boy lost round eight decisively and was clearly getting tired. AL had Steve ripe for harvest, but he didn’t seem to notice. He changed tactics again, choosing to up his punch-count dramaticly and cover up every time Erkle came close. The fresher man won round nine easily. Remember my argument with Bronze? Going into round ten, Steve’s right eye was closed, he was clearly tired and I had him winning by only one point. Bronze, however, felt we had a three point lead and that we might be able to squeek out the win if we just managed to win one of the last three rounds. AL took the fight back inside. There wasn’t much Steve could do about it. To make matters worse, this was the round Bronze wanted him to win. According to him, our guy wasn’t going to get any fresher. It didn’t work. We landed only 14 of 60 punches, and AL LEE won the round easily. Bronze, still hoping to win a round, told Steve to throw everything even though his ass was dragging. There must have been some confusion about the scoring in AL’s corner as well, because he got on his bicycle and spent round eleven running backwards throwing punches. I laughed so hard I almost pissed my pants. Steve was blind, trying to chase AL and throwing a lot of punches at air and in the mean time, AL was running backwards tapping him with light jabs all over the place. Bronze tried to keep it together, but he had a full-on belly laugh going on, too. The crowd thaught they were watching an old Three Stuges rerun. AL LEE has always been a little weird and has fit in nicely in the Angee gym because of their bizar style of coaching, but this was pure commody. AL won the round though. According to my card, that put us down one. According to Bronze we were up one. The dispute was going to matter. Barring a lightning strik on AL LEE or a surprise forfeit by Angee we were going to lose or tie. Once more, Erkle was swining wild trying to find his target and this time, AL was looking for a place to hide and covering up. He threw only eight punches and landed seven of them. Steve Erkle threw sixty, landing nine. We actually won the last round. Bronze leaped over the top rope and ran over to congratulate Steve, but our fighter colapsed in the center of the ring and it was 20 minutes before we could revive him for the announcement. Judge Guimond was apparently the only judge wearing glasses that night and scored it as I saw it – A draw. Judge Leinbach scored it 114 – 112 for AL LEE and Larry Holmes saw the same fight Judge Bronze saw. It goes into the books as a Draw, but Bronze and I are still arguing. Please watch the fight yourselves, go to the FORUM and tell us how you scored it.

Conan “The Iranian” vs. John T. Scopes: This was the second match for young Conan. He is right, he does have a cool name, but he really needs to learn how to deal with the press. In his first press release, he alianated most of the members in his gym by implying that they were second rate and that his success in the fight business would be due to the coolness of his name and not his management and fellow fighters. Well, he got his chance to prove himself against the little powerhouse, Scopes, a promising fighter from Top Rank’s gym. The Iranian danced while John T. grabbed his opponent whenever he got the chance and pounded on his body. This was pretty much the same tactics one might expect the two of them to use. Conan easily won the first two rounds and took the thid off, working Scopes’s midsection. He won the fourth round with an increased punch- count, but was starting to fade. Again, he went to the clinch, working the body hard. Unfortunately, he was weakened too much by fatigue and didn’t produce much damage on the fresher Scopes. John was picking up th tempo, now, and The Iranian was slowing down. It didn’t look good for the cocky young Iranian. With Scopes’ increased production, he was able to continue working the body and win round six. That was three rounds each. Scopes had the fight won at this point as The Iranian was exhausted. Scopes continued the slaughter easily winning rounds seven and eight. Behind by three going into round nine, the nearly crippled Iranian upped his punch count. Things went from bad to worse as the damage accumulated. Finally, near the end of the round, Conan was begging for mercy and John T. Scopes won by TKO. This was more than Bronze could handle after the big press fiasco and Conan “The Iranian” was put on suspension.

February 29: Erkinwhine drew a match with Firelady; one of Big Boy, Inc.'s fighters. Since Big Boy, Inc. has been absent for a while, all we had to do is look at Firelady's last few matches to figure out what he was going to do and train Erk to look out for it. Because Firelady is in wear 'em down and knock 'em out mode, we asked Erk to do just enough to get a good lead early and coast to a win against the clinching Firelady. And that's exactly what he did.

Teflon Southpaw vs. Entombed: Teflon told us he was looking forward to this match with the fighter from The coroner's gym. He thought it looked like a good matchup, pitting a tall dancer with a short slugger. Entombed started clinching as would have been expected while Southpaw stayed outside and used his jab as much as he could. Teflon noted early on that this guy was hitting harder than his sparring partner did. Round two went much like round one had and Teflon was up by two. Looking to change things up, Entombed moved inside and started to bank away, but Teflon managed to win round three as well. This fight was definately shaping up to be the tipical slapper/slugger match up. Entombed went back to the clinch for round four and surprisingly increased his production, winning round four, but only managing to tie round five. Unphased, Teflon stuck to our plan as Entombed went back to banging the body for round six. Entombed threw an incredible seventy-five punches to win the seventh round. The fight was getting close and We didn't count on this from the slugger. He had yet to really damabe Teflon, though, and we seemed to have the fresher fighter. Entombed went back inside for rounds eight and nine, banging away. Surprisingly, Southpaw weathered the attack well, winning both rounds. Entombed was obviously tired and seeming to be despirate. He tried one more round inside without any change in his luck before going all out in round eleven. We had planned on a late round despirate attack and Teflon was ready for him, getting another knock our for the gym and putting a cap on a pretty good week.

In the end, our gym posted a nice record of 10/3/1 (6/2)

That gives us a combined 19/14/2 (11/6) for the month of February.



February 17 - 22

February 16: American Staffordshire Terrior suffers a dissapointing seventh round KO loss to Frank "Enfurter" Esler from the Duke of Dorkdom gym. Things were going according to plan and She seemed poised to coast to another victory ahead by a wide margin on all cards when "Enfurter" unexpectedly went all out in the seventh. We suspect someone leaked our fight plan since she was prepared for the all out in round eight. AST is very ashamed of her defeat as the first fight of the week and in such devistating fashion. She has vowed revenge and has gone on an all hot dog diet in anticipation of a rematch.

February 17: Tooloose Mywallet found his comeback stalled by an unfortunate decision loss to Oogleberry of Top Rank's gym. As expected, Tooloose got off to an early lead, but couldn't manage to get more than a one point edge as Oogleberry kept upping his punch count every other round. Instead of resting in round ten as expected, Oogleberry poured it on and the two fighters were tied going into round eleven. Oogleberry kept swinging away throwing 82 punches in round eleven to take a slim margin into round twelve. Both fighters sucked deeply on their water bottles as they rested between rounds. Oogleberry must not have realized he was leading, because he threw more than eighty punches from his clinch. The opportunity was there for Tooloose, who was going for the knock out with the twelfth round all out. It was not to be, however, as he was unable to break free of Oogleberry's clinch and land an effective shot.

February 18: Basasrorytaugh went balls out against benny capers (a francell fighter) in the fourth round and scored a nice knock down. Unfortunately, the effort left him with too little left in the tank to mount any other real offense and he lost by a very lopsided decision.

Tallon vs. Joe Montana: We though we had a good matchup for this fight against another boxer from Top Rank's gym and were prepared for a war. Tallon danced for the first two rounds, pawing with a few light jabs while Joe came out and began to work up a sweat early. Tallon sprang what he thought would be a surprise all out in the third round, but the surprize was all his as Joe put him down for a seven count. It was a flash knock down and Tallon's only injury was to his ego and the fact that he was down by four points after just three rounds. Despite the early knock down, neither fighter needed to rest. Tallon tried the all out again in the fifth only to find himself looking up at the lights as Richard Steel counted to ten. Aside from getting pleanty of sleep in the ring, Tallon appears to have no ill effects from the fight. He insists that Joe had a look in his eye at the beginning of both rounds three and five that suggested he knew the "surprise" all out was coming. He has been lobbying Bronze to hire a PI to discover who is selling our fight plans.

Fred "Stilts" Cannon vs. Bill Badmann: We worked all week getting Cannon ready to face this guy from Paz McCay's gym. The plan was to keep the slightly shorter Badmann at bay with the jab and to score enough to squeak out a close decision without spending too much energy and leaving ourselves open to the late KO. Well, we didn't have to worry about the late KO. Stilts made up his own plan and went all out in round one. The first time he got knocked down he hit so hard he bounced right back to his feet. The second time he went down, he stuck. Dalby Shirley could have counted to 1,000 and Cannon still wouldn't have gotten up. Thanks, Bill for teaching our guy to listen to his coaches.

February 20: Harvey Fierstein's long-awaited comeback got off to a rocky start when he just couldn't get it going against the much younger and lighter Symphony X managed by The Coronor. Symphony X was just too light and too nimble for the old man to keep up with him. In the end, down by a ton of points, Harvey went for the despiration KO and X put him on his back for his troubles. He was able to get to his feet by the count of six and escape the embarassment of a knock out loss, but he was pretty pathetic.

Bronze Southpaw vs. Freddie Adu: This wasn't the matchup Bronze was looking for after a long layoff. He would have preferred not to begin his comeback against an opponent from Top Rank's gym. But that's what he got and he was determined to make the most of it. Bronze got off to an early lead, but Adu was keeping it close. Somehow, Bronze sustained a cut above his right eye during the fifth round. He claims it came from a foreign object Adu had conceiled in his shorts, but referee, Jay Nady didn't find anything in a post-fight pat down. Nonetheless, the cut did seem to bother Bronze as he seemed to lose some of his accuracy. Adu continued to alternate rounds of slapping and powerpunches until rounds nine, ten and eleven, when he managed take the according to our cards. Bronze found himself in the uncomfortable position of needing a knock down in the twelfth round and went for it. He came up short, however, and lost a close decision. It appears he doesn't have to stew on the loss too long, since the rematch is scheduled for next week.

Bronze Southpaw Jr. vs. Richard "Doctor" Kimble: Junior was worried all week about this match up with the Doctor We have a lot of respect for the fighters who come out of the Demise gym. I guess the younger Bronze just doesn't know how good he really is. He built an overwhelming lead going into the twelfth round, leaving Kimble no choice but to go all out and hope for the best. The best doesn't often come when you need it and it didn't come for him. Junior paid attention to his trainers and laid Kimble out on the canvas. After his opponent was counted out, Bronze added insult to injury when he asked, "Is there a doctor in the house?" Of course, noone understood, because he forgot to take out his mouthpiece.

Paul "Stumpy" Buniuns vs. Goober: This boxer from the Bugrott gym just doesn't seem to get the idea that he needs to conserve energy. Once more, he throws a ton of punches. This time Stumpy closes down the show early with a two knock downs in the first round before Goober once more staret crying for his mommy

February 21: Newcomer Conan "The Iranian" had a match against Zint, some guy Angee found sleeping in the gutter in front of his gym. Angee has met with some success of late by giving bums booted from other gyms a second chance. We are happy to say that this bum will have to look elsewhere for his comeback. In all fairness, this fight was a back-and-forth struggle between the two fighters. The Iranian managed to take a one point lead into the final round and as expected, the bum came all out. Conan was waiting for him and got a nice knock down and a six count. Conan took the decision over the bum and that's what counts.

Steve Erkle vs. Becky Gilbert: Erkle came into this fight hungry to avenge the DQ from last week. Unfortunately, Da Butcher's girl had to take the brunt of his return to the ring. Becky came out flapping her arms like a turkey that thinks it's gonna fly and Erkle hit her like a wreaking ball. Not only did he put her on the mat twice in the first round for the KO win, but he also broke her nose for good measure.

February 22: Teflon Southpaw had a match against Mark Cuban, not only is he a rich guy who owns a basketball team, but he's also a fighter managed by Top Rank. Cuban gave Teflon the first six rounds, choosing, instead, to wear his opponent down. After the sixth round, he began to pick up his punch count and win rounds. Then in round eleven, he attacked without mercy sending Teflon down twice - the second time for good. Teflon was contemplating retirement after that beating, but we think he will try one more fight before he makes up his mind.

Erkinwine vs. Silent Death: This fight is somewhat ironic, since Erk is a necromancer. Anyway, Death fights for The Coronor so I guess that's sort of ironic, too. I think Erk was a little too cought up in the irony, because he threw out his fight plan. He didn't throw enough punches to take control, nor did he use enough power to assert himself. In the end, he was like a cancer patient going through kimo. It didn't kill him, but it left him a wreck. He couldn't even muster enough with the twelfth round all out to get a knock down or go out valiently on his back - ironicly pathetic.

In the end, our gym posted a miserable record of 4/9/0 (3/3)

That gives us a combined 9/11/1 (5/4) since our return to BDB



February 9 - 16

February 9: American Staffordshire Terrior ushers in the gym's return with a decisive decision victory against Zero to 60 in ?? from Angee's gym. This was apparently a dissapointing loss for Angee as Zero was pulled from the Welter Tournament immediatly after the fight. AST is a young and energetic fighter, whom we welcome to our gym. She needs some work but we expect good things from her in the weeks to come.

February 11: Fred "Stilts" Cannon follows the rookie's performance with a devistating fifth round KO, Knocking out Henry Jack from the Lubber Clang Gym. The fight in which Jack found himself on the mat three times in the fifth round probably left the looser with some pain he'll feel for weeks to come. Our advice to Jack would be to move down to Cruiserweight. He ain't big enough for the big boys.

February 12: Was a day this gym will remember for some time to come. First, some upstart SUNUFFAGUN calls out Latex Southpaw from semi-retirement. The man is't even sure he wants to fight anymore, but his honor is now at stake, so he takes the fight. It's likely that this is a ploy from the Angee gym to avenge the loss earlier in the week to AST. To add insult to injury, we find out the fight is to take place in the livingroom of SUNUFFAGUN's Aunt Jenni. There isn't enough room for Latex's attendants, but the building superintendant agrees to work his corner. This fight had the makings of a real desaster and it lived up to every bit of it. At the end of the seventh round, Aunt Jenni gets up on the ring apron and does a striptease. This really has an affect on Latex, who is knocked down a total of eight times from round eight through round eleven. Noone can say he wasn't a game competitor but alas he was unable to get to his feet in time and was counted out in the eleventh round. All seven people in attendance that night saw one hell of a fight, but Latex not only came up short, but suffered a career-ending injury. When we last heard from him, he was heading out to the country to spend some time with the mother of his love-child

Do to some scheduling difficulties and circumstances beyond our control, there were no fights from February 13 or 14.

February 15 - Night of the Mega-card: Because there had been no fights on the previous two nights, the cards on this night were huge. We had five fighters with fights on this night.

Paul "Stumpy" Buniuns vs. Ako: Ako from the JufranX gym was no match for young Stumpy. The terrified Ako hid behind his gloves for the whole twelve rounds, despite the repeated boos from the angry crowd. Stumpy did what he could to make a fight out of it, including putting Ako down once in the twelfth. Unfortunately, he struggled back to his feet and hid once more behind his large gloves. Stumpy won by an unimpressive decision.

Bronze Southpaw Jr. vs. Goober: We're still trying to figure out what happened in this fight. Each round, as soon as the bell rang, Goober began throwing wild punches. They didn't trouble Junior, though as they had nothing on them. If anyone knows if this was manager Bugrott's fight plan or if Goober was having a seisure, please let us know. Like his father before him, Junior stuck to his plan and Goober was crying for his mommy in round five leaving referee, Dalby Shirley, no choice but to stop the fight.

Steve Erkle vs. Rico Rodriguez: We have always known that Steve had the power to end a fight with just one punch and he proved it that night. Unfortunately, that punch was below the belt and it cost him the fight. We think Eddy Crown's fighter might have been doing a bit of acting, but it is nevertheless a lesson for Erkle to keep his punches above the beltline.

Teflon Southpaw vs. Sanity Clause: Teflon easily lived up to his name as he slipped punches and danced circles around the slower Clause. That's one more win for our gym. This one feels good as it's against Eddy Crown's gym and we are a little sore about that earlier fight with Erkle.

Erkinwhine vs. Mr Duckface: This was supposed to be the finale for our gym. It was an oppertunity to close out the week with a quality win against a quality gym. We could take pride in beating anyone from Big Boy, Inc. Unfortunately, Erk let this one slip away. We told him going into round twelve that he had a slim lead and all he needed was to win that last round for the decision. But he took the round off and it ended in a tie - shamefull.


In the end, our gym posted a respectable record of 5/2/1 (2/1)